no botox allowed.

I Can Only Imagine

2012-01-30T13:52:00.000-08:00

Today Is Matthews Birthday

He is 37
I wonder what he is doing today
I know he is having a GREAT day
I KNOW he KNOWS that if he were here with us
there would be presents
cake
crab legs
all his favorite things
family

I wanted to share with you a FUN tradition that Matthew always
had with his family on New Years Eve

They would collect many Christmas trees
from the neighbors
put them all in his large fire pit in their backyard
invite everyone over
and light it up

Matthew lived life LARGE
and everything he did had to be "over the top"

Here is Matthew at his tree burning
TA DA
gotta love it

His children are still carrying out Matt's tradition
(with help from mommy of course)

Equally excited
same pose
It makes them happy to still share that with their dad
I am sure he See's it
that's what I imagine.

Life continues to repeat like tides and waves of the ocean
always changing
yet forever the same
(anonymous)

I imagine that is how it should be
yes, Matthew is not physically with us now
but he is part of everything we do

I miss him still so very much

not a day goes by, perhaps even an hour

where he doesn't fill my mind and heart

But despite the pain that is with those he left behind

I CAN ONLY IMAGINE

that he is happy, free from "his" personal pain

surrounded by beauty

and with people who love him, those who have passed on before

it's "their" reunion

I really love this song

so if you take the time to listen to it

I think you will smile with me

as my eyes fill with tears again

cause, I can only Imagine.

When I first heard this song, it was sung by Alex Boye, he sang at Matt's funeral as is a friend of theirs

he is a professional artist
but I could not find his version on you tube.

GO BIG OR GO HOME

2012-01-24T16:46:00.000-08:00

You all know these sayings...right

Go Big or Go Home

Big is Beautiful

If ya wanna run with the Big Dog's get off the Porch
I love big butts and I can not lie

I have been thinking lately about BIG

everything lately seems to have to be big

I am bigger now then I have ever been in my life
yeah yeah yeah, it's my own fault
(as I punch me in the face)

So I am trying to fix that
You know the drill, exercise (#_)^*&^#*)_), eat right, eat less
I'll "get er done"
it's a process for crying out loud

But this post is not just about ME

it has to do with how EVERYTHING is getting bigger

example: Look at the different sizes of plates here.
the smaller one is what people USED to eat on
we've Upsized
also the cups

no wonder we are getting Fluffier
(p.s. the roses are NOT dead, they are DRIED)
my sweet friend Claudie told me to Water my roses. so funny

and look at what we are eating

don't spend a lot of time looking at it
as you might gain 5 lbs on sight

it is a burger, bacon, jalapeno cheese, egg
topped with a Krispy Kream donut
Fries on the side
(my weakness is fries)

But it is even more then just food
we all want bigger houses, take bigger vacations
big screen tv's
king sized beds

and what about parties
Seriously, some kids parties are becoming Oscar worthy

I monumentally failed in the birthday party giving
Yeah my kids had them
but we played pin the tail on the donkey
spin the bottle
musical chairs

I am not saying I am against any of these things
(except that burger thingy)

But maybe it's time to rethink BIG

Heck, I am even finding when I say my prayers
thanking first
then putting in my request for a better day
help me with this and that
and don't forget to bless so and so

I find myself wanting to say
"And, could you Supersize that for Me"

amen

Bahamas-Canada? Bahamas-Canada?

2012-01-18T13:43:00.000-08:00

In January

IS THIS REALLY A QUESTION?

(pinterest)

(from local internet weather reports)

Well, this kind of looks like My place

COLD, The Sun can't even seem to get through the icy atmosphere

So I decided to take you for a little walk today

first let's check the weather

We have 89% humidity, which adds to the freezyness (new word)

ok, let's go

this is all the ice on the Inside of my screen door

(minus the screen, has the window in it now)

hmmm, so what kind of door would that be?

Better check on the Horses

there they are

Come donner, come dasher, come comet and blitzen

oh wait, wrong names

here they come, boy, does the snow ever CRUNCH when you walk on it

like it's breaking

(that's Mr. Gorgeous' hand as he is trying to hold the horses head still)

I wanted to show you how HAIRY they get in the winter.

Their winter coat.

this is under her neck

kind of reminds me of This

(pinterest)

More hairyness, (another new word)

Better check their water and make sure it's not Frozen

see that hose in it

It has a Heater gadget at the bottom which keeps the water warmish

(warmish, this is why I don't write books, vocabulary issues)

yup, guess it is working ok

Well, he's ready to head on out, and My face is pretty much frozen by now

poor frozen butt

good thing Mine is covered

Only Lucy is wanting to spend more time outside

wanting to go do some chores

Wasn't that fun

WHY would I want to go to the Bahamas?

I'll just cuddle up by the stove

brrrrrr

Dang, I don't have any eye makeup on

(note to self: do not have pictures taken without your eye makeup)

but hey, my legs aren't shaved either.

Talk to you later when Things have thawed out here a bit

GO TAKE A HIKE

2012-01-12T13:12:00.000-08:00

now, that was fun to say.

(before I start this post, some of you misunderstood the poem I had on my post below. My cousin Did NOT die. That poem was written by my NIECE, (Matthew's cousin) when Matthew died, about Matthew)

NOW, about the Hike

on THIS mountain

you saw a photo of this mountain on my post below

Old Chief Mountain....I refer to it as MY mountain

If you look at it, the way it got it's name is because

it is the side FACE of a chief, laying down
with his headdress behind him

the left end is his chin

can you see it

LOOK HARDER

pretty isn't it

(google)

Well my dearies, I CLIMBED THIS MOUNTAIN

Yup, this rickety old lady actually DID

Now, today anyway, I can barely climb the stairs as I have started my new exercise regime

and I am stiff...STIFF I TELL YOU

But back when I climbed this mountain, I was lithe, calves like steel, arms like rocks, and abs you could spin a nickel on

(I may have exaggerated here a little)

Back when I was 30'ish (can't even remember the exact time)

I was visiting my folks, who live quite close to this mountain.

My Uncle, challenged me and my sister to climb the mountain

Since I was living in the states at the time

He called me a YANKEE SISSY

HA.......I was certainly going to show him

So, this particular day, he and his wife and 2 of his boys

some of their friends

MY 2 oldest boys

me and my sister

headed out

cause I had an IMAGE to maintain

First, indulge me just a moment to tell you a little bit about this mountain.

It has an elevation of 3000 feet.

THREE THOUSAND.....DO YOU HEAR ME

It is actually in Montana. That's how close to the border

my folks live

It is in the Glacier National Park area

The Blackfoot Indian youth used to climb this mountain to fast, and to experience their vision quest.

(I was seeing visions myself by the time I got to the top)

Chief Mountain has been a sacred mountain to

Native Americans for 100's of years.

The Blackfoot name is Ninastiko.

--------------now that reminds me of a little story to tell you------

I love Indian Names

and often times, in my family

we like to come up with unique Indian names to give ourselves

We try to fit it to the personality of that person

Like...my daughter was Falling Rain, because she used to cry a lot

My youngest son was Wild Turkey

cause he was rambunctious

Well, the summer that I was getting ready to move up here

and marry Mr. Gorgeous

my sweet DIL

said I should be called

"She who warms many buffalo robes"

(since this was going to be my third marriage..smarty pants)

sorry, back to the mountain

There is a legend about Old Chief...that goes like this

"the Blackfoot Indians believe that IF this mountain falls, that means the spirit of the mountain is not happy

with the white man

and therefore, The Indians will once again rage war

upon them.

Now, I don't even know if that is TRUE, or not

but I grew up with this story

And FYI, the face of this mountain is starting to slide. SO, they don't really even want people climbing it anymore.

SO LETS GO

put your hiking boots on and I'll take you there

(all these next photos are from google, all Old Chief ..from hikes)

This was the beginning. We all drove our vehicles

to the base of this mountain. We went as far

as was possible in the car.

Then we started our hike, going to the RIGHT

headed around to the backside

And then you see THIS

those mountains are in Glacier National Park

Ah...the fresh air, the magnificent sights

I felt good, being the FIT person I was then

It starts to get difficult

The backside is loose with softball sized rocks

and it is hard to get your footing.

Uncle is feeling a bit cocky about now

I am trying not to grimace

We started at the BOTTOM folks

by now I am sucking wind

and seeing those visions I was talking about

the Uncle and young boys seem to be having no problem-o

I started doing a lot of THIS

standing to ENJOY THE VIEW

(and rest.....holy mountain goat, I needed rest)

Then FINALLY

many hours later

We made it to the top

THE TOP IS NARROW !!!

only 8 feet wide in some places

and there is a BIG drop off

and it can be really WINDY

I sat my tush down, and didn't move

my uncles boys and MY boys

were walking back and forth, across that narrow top

I thought I was going to throw up

BUT I DID IT
This Yankee Sissy DID IT

(and I never did it again, I'm not stupid)

I was so happy though that I had that opportunity

met the challenge

lived to tell about it

"sometimes all you need is 20 seconds of insane courage

to change a lifetime.....anonymous"

This is a more recent photo

a grandaughter, last summer

I love this mountain

It has been a part of me my whole life

It's home

Chasing angels, or fleeing demons,

go to the mountains

Jeffrey Rasley

ROCKING CHAIRS, ROCKING BABIES, ROCK-A-BYE, ROCK OF AGES

2012-01-08T13:42:00.000-08:00

I just spent some time visiting my parents

they are aging...80 and 82

their health is failing, fast

and it made me think about LIFE

and "how it rolls"

because it DOES.....ROLL

Once upon a time I never dreamed I'd be 60

well, yes I knew SOMEDAY I would

but not for a LONG, LONG time

and ya know what

It's Time

Once

I spent a lot of time in this chair

Rocking Babies

I LOVED rocking my babies

and now they are grown

When I was a tired, young mom

I thought they'd Never grow

but they did

of course

and sometimes , after you have rocked those babies

and watched them become Grown Ups
your eyes see only a bright future for them

then....there is a shift in life

an unforseen breeze

and...one suddenly is gone

And life continues to Roll

as a mom, you just hope that the time spent in that rocking chair

singing lullabyes, and dreaming of their future,

that better then the kisses you gave them

were the Roots you built for them

and the hope that their wings will be strong enough to carry them where they need to go

I certainly had Roots to hold on to

these portraits hang on the wall at my parents house

These people were part of my roots

ROCK OF OLD

middle photo is my Great Grandpa

far right is IONE Walburger--my Great Grandmother

I was named after her

Ione is my middle name

and the lady far left was Great Grandpa's mother

Certainly a part of my roots

this beautiful old hutch belonged to them

brought across the plains

when they immigrated from Germany

my mom has it in her house..has been passed down

and lovingly cared for

ROCK OF AGES

precious things

The young girl on the right is my Grandmother Vera Wright

see that necklace she is wearing

well, my sister has it..........the very one hanging on this photo

All these things are tangible items

to remind you of your roots and those things that "molded you"

I have this in my cute cabin

I will do a little repair. paint and re-vamp it this summer

It belonged to my mom

and was given to her for her birthday when she was 10

Built by that very Great Grandpa whose photo was above

and mom's dad

I can't wait to have my grandchildren play with the little dishes I'll put in there and tell them stories about these ancestors of theirs

building roots...strengthening those wings

my parents house is on the property of my grandparents

grandpa's old barn...still standing.....barely

I spent lots of time playing in there

reminds me of a song

"I got my education out behind the barn

and I ain't fooling nosiree

passed each examination out behind the barn

and it darn near made a wreck out of me"

(tee,hee...has some funny verses to it)

this photo of the barn was taken by one of my neices

she used it in a poem she wrote on her blog

when my son Matthew died

(in part)

.................. home is there, too. that barn in Canada,
where I've never lived but spent each summer of my life
I like to breath the air there.

home is where I love the most.
Home is my family.
Where I'm loved the most.
Here.
and there.

.............My cousin passed away last week.
It's been a long thinking week. about him. about home.
about family. time. the important stuff.

We spent a lot of days at that barn.

I love my family. It's hard not to be with them now.
Not that there's anything I could do for them
to make it stop.
but it's hard to be
away.

it helps to know,
Matt's home.
resting.
and I'm pretty sure he likes the air there.

I took this picture the morning I left my parents place

OLD CHIEF MOUNTAIN

This mountain has overlooked the land of my ancestors for Generations

and I softly smiled thinking

how lucky I am

how much I am loved

how much I love back

family

Rocks

you never outgrow the landscape of your childhood !

and if you want to hear an amazing video about LIFE and HOW IT MATTERS go HERE, and visit this blog

it's not just about rocking babies, ...........that's only a beginning

how all the people in our life, effects us ...MATTERS

DON'T LET THE NEW YEAR HIT YOU IN THE BUTT ON YOUR WAY OUT

2012-01-01T16:36:00.000-08:00

Speaking of 2011

see...yaaaaa

was a hard year for me, glad to be moving on

I am putting "positive vibes" into the universe

for 2012

Oprah said, whatever you throw into the universe

you get back

(and we ALL know Oprah knows everything)

so 2012, Here I Come

gonna get'er done

make improvements

find Wendy again
learn

seek

grow

I had a fabulous time visiting my family in Utah

We laughed !!!!

and laughed some more

and tried to grab a nap

and danced

and picked our nose

and posed

and postured

and goofed

and sang

and gathered

(here's a line up for ya...from left to right, My FIRST husbands wife, DIL Caryn, DIL Rena ,ME, SECOND husbands mother, DIL Becky

front row DIL Leslie, DAUGHTER Emma)

yes we are a unique family

(DIL and her hubby.. my Son.. Daughter)

and last minute shopped

and remembered

AND IT WAS ALL WONDERFUL

My very best present from my children

was THIS

a very large photo of all ten of these angels

my grandkids

(ranging in age from 15 to 3)

The only thing better then the photo would be bringing them home with me

OH NO....WAIT

that's the joy of being a grandma

you spoil them, then leave them at home (tee,hee)

Mr. Gorgeous and I spent New Years Eve at our friends house

(some of you readers may remember it was just last New Years Eve, while we four were out celebrating that our friend Ricks only brother and SIL were Killed in a car collision)

We wanted to keep things a little more low key this year

but we did sport the party hats

an toasted in the New Year

I do know that 2012 will come with its share

of joy and heartache

every year does.

but for whatever comes

I want to be STRONGER

and better

and be more charitable

Keep on loving each other as brothers

Do not forget to entertain strangers

for by so doing

some people have entertained ANGELS

without knowing it.

Hebrews 13:12

and that is my Toast to all of you

ALREADY ????

2011-12-30T14:34:00.000-08:00

Seriously

Is it New Years nearly

2012

maybe I'll get around to doing a post one of these days.

maybe

HAPPY NEW YEAR

I appreciate ALL OF YOU

Yup.............I think we all are HOPING

(comments off.......go party)

I'LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS

2011-12-09T12:42:00.000-08:00

You can count on me.

There'll be snow, and mistletoe

and GRANDKIDS ON MY KNEE

(Mr Gorgeous hates it when I say I'm going Home, cause he say's THIS IS NOW YOUR HOME)

anyway

Home is wherever my loved ones are, and so I guess I have two homes right now

the one where my kids are

and here, where Mr. Gorgeous is

(me and my kids......but now the one on the bottom left, is not with us)

That is the part that will make Christmas (and all Christmas's in the future)

a little more difficult

One will always be missing.

I found this quote from Joseph Campbell:

FIND A PLACE INSIDE WHERE THERE IS JOY

AND THE JOY WILL BURN OUT THE PAIN

(Don't you think this is interesting about QUOTES, like WHO IS Joseph Campbell anyway?)

My kids and grandkids bring me Great Joy

My memories of Matt brings me Joy

My faith brings me Joy

so there will be a measure of Joy this Christmas

Today I am remembering Christmas's from when I was a child

with my grandparents

they were simpler back then, but packed with fun

food

games

(no one made Christmas goodies that could match grandma's)

We'd sit around their BIG wooden round table, and play Cards

Rook, to be precise

and eat grandma's goodies

(me and my sister)

Grandma always had a simple, little tree

Presents were brought out in a cardboard box

all simply wrapped

not the STAGING people go to these days

and it was joyful

(and fyi, that gorgeous old fashioned hutch came across the plains with my great grandparents.....LOVE IT)

(here is an old photo of grandpa out feeding the cows...this wagon was horse drawn)

There were times we'd go to visit them for Christmas

and our car would get stuck in all the snow trying to get down that country road

so....my dad would walk to the closest neighbor house

and grandpa would bring out the tractor and Haul us in

as young kids that was a great adventure

but now

living in the country as I do, it would be a pain in the toosh

Best Memories Ever

This brings me JOY

Years ago, my mother painted this Christmas Ball of the Mountain

OLD CHIEF

which is out their front window

It is precious as this was before she had a tumor in her

head removed

and NOW, she would never be able to do such a thing

I keep very tender care of it

(pinterest)

I love this picture

because I want to remind my grandchildren

that EVEN Santa, understands and is humbled

by the real meaning of CHRISTmas.

Joy to the World.

(unknown)

And yet

There is still room for Magic and Mystical, in Christmas

all the Wonders as seen through the eyes of a child

I like that part too

The twinkling lights, the sounds of sleigh bells

carolers

smell of gingerbread

taste of fudge

It's all part of the JOY

Therefore, I believe there will be a lot of Joy for me

this Christmas

and I will savor every moment

relish every hug

share every tear

and remember

Through the Years, we all will be together

IF the fates allow........

That's the part we are not guaranteed.

That we will be together IN BODY all the time

But we will through the eternities

AND WHAT COULD BE MORE JOYFUL THEN THAT.

I hope you all have a Christmas full of love

THE STORY OF THE CHRISTMAS SKUNK

2011-12-01T15:02:00.000-08:00

Yeah it is ME
(bring out your tissues)

I am the Christmas Skunk

cause I stink at it this year

I haven't got the JOLLY feeling

or interest

..stinky..

Maybe because I haven't done anything really Christmas-y.

NO DECORATIONS up yet

Except for this

(google)

remember these, we had them on our tree when I was a little girl

Well, we have ONE now, as a night light

Pretty impressive...right!!!

Jaw dropping

and I put out a snowman plate......in the kitchen

I have a Christmas Cactus (so it's called) and this is one of my favorite decorations

the rocking horse

I keep it in my hutch all year, that's the only reason I got it out

Are you amazed yet, yeah I know

kinda stinky

deserves The Stink Eye, as one of my fellow bloggers always says

now you are probably thinking, hey, it's only Dec. 1st

BUT...I won't be putting up anything else

I am going to Utah for Christmas, leaving in 13 days

so I am not "inspired" to even want anything up

I'd like to put something festive on my door, or outside

maybe like this

(pinterest)

I really DO like pretty things, Honest I do

so cute, but alas, I can't

nope

because we get BIG WINDS

and just last week this is what happened

My beautiful HEAVY wood swing got blown right off the porch

so unless I bolt things down

no decorating goes on outside

Claudie gave me this really cute Christmas wind chime last summer

But I can't hang it outside

so it has a permanent place in my green house. I keep it up ALL YEAR LONG there

and it makes me happy

I do love These at Christmas time however

Best oranges in the world, and they come out at Christmas

NO NO my Yankee friends

they are not like tangerines

they are the oranges grown in the Garden of Eden

easy to peel, no seeds, juicy

Eve loved them

Another thing I stink at

is baking....haven't done any

not a crumb

and I haven't made anything

sent anything

listened to a single Christmas melody

Boy do I stink

it costs a lot to mail stuff from Canada

pretty much have to sign away your first born

ridiculous

(excuses???)

I wanted to do this for my Christmas cards

(if I were inclined to send any)

(pinterest)

I could have totally done that

except my horses are black (kinda like my attitude)

and I don't have a cape

but other then that , I could have pulled it off (tee,hee)

Christmas trees sure have changed over the years

right

When I was little we hung tinsel on our tree

my mom was SPECIFIC that every, single

piece of tinsel be layed individually and hung just right.

and we only got chips and dip on

Christmas Eve....!!!

(don't know what made me think of that, except I'm hungry)

because there are no Christmas treats in the house

(me and my little sister)

Did you guys used to do this, or still are??

When I was raising my kids, we often did the Nativity Scene

With only one daughter, of course she got the roll of Mary

back row is Matthew and Troy

and baby Jesus is Travis

Trent not born yet...was 1980

I miss that

We had a fox run through our yard

But he didn't stay long

cause he knew there was a skunk around

really...all I want for Christmas is

to be back to the gal I used to be

not sure where she went

have Matthew back (not realistic)

Do one more Nativity Scene

hug the grandkids

Stink a whole lot less

because, in all seriousness

I DO KNOW

this should be the

Most Wonderful Time of the Year

The Hap-Happiest Season of all

So I'll go stick some mistletoe up my jolly butt

(ouch , that might hurt)

ha ha...puts a whole new "light" on kissing under the mistletoe

WHILE YOU WERE EATING TURKEY

2011-11-24T11:49:00.000-08:00

I AM POSTING ABOUT STRUDELS

Because I know you will be riveted to this story of

tradition

(and it might help me not be so glum over the fact that I am not with my kids this Thanksgiving....sniff, sniff)

Mr. Gorgeous's mom just had a birthday....she's 88

she walks 3 miles a day

she whips my butt at cards all. the. time.

Hubby loves "setting her up" for embarrassing moments, and she just laughs hysterically about it.

So we headed up north to hubby's nieces house
and LUCKY for us
we didn't have to deal with THIS

This is what the highway was like the DAY BEFORE we had to leave
and that being said, we usually Never take the Queen E2 highway....we prefer back roads
(photo courtesy of our local weather internet page)
back to strudels

When MIL was a young girl, in a large family, money was scarce.

In order to fill the belly's of those kids her mom made Strudels.

One of those recipes that has been handed down through generations of Her family

It is like bread dough...but without the Yeast.

First you take the dough out of the pan and lay it out on a table, which is covered with a cloth

(hubby's niece and MIL)

Then you grease up your hands with melted bacon grease so you can stretch out the dough as thin as you can before it tears. Sometimes it reaches across most of the table.

After it is stretched as much as possible, you sprinkle it with the bacon grease

Roll it and Roll it

(and mark it with.......S)

those hands have made many a strudel in their day

Kinda looks like intestines doesn't it........yummmm, tasty

See the parts that are bubbled up more

that's what you want cause they bake up crispy

So while you are rolling around with the dough

you put on pots of stew

bubble bubble, boil and brew

(that's the miss witchy coming out in me)

Take the intestines...I mean dough.....and place on top of the stew

See that one with the big Bubble (looking like a full bladder)

that is the best, what you want to happen, cause as I mentioned

they cook up Crispy

Cook in Oven

Look how purty

Hubby's niece dishing it up

So That We

Can line up and do This

taste test....picking out the Crispy parts..............THE BEST

(MIL in middle, great-grandaughter, me, girlfriend, another great- grandaughter on end)

then we eat until we are about to burst

just like on Thanksgiving

And remembering to be Thankful.......always

for Life, and the Blessing of being 88

MIL with her Granddaughter (Mr. Gorgeous's niece, the Strudel Queen this day....carrying on the tradition)

AND her First great-great grandson

As the sun set on this day

We took our tired gorged belly's home

on the Back roads

I was thinking about MY family......missing them, conjuring up many happy memories

on that quiet drive

and realizing.........I am THANKFUL for the outstretched arms and acceptance

of extended families

Where Traditions and Love always march forward

and That my friends

is life in the day of a Strudel

(say Strudel with your BEST German accent)

IT'S OFFICIAL

2011-11-16T16:09:00.000-08:00

I guess it is official now

I am a bonafide Canadian

why

BECAUSE I WENT TO MY FIRST NHL HOCKEY GAME

here is a little itty bit of history for ya
the Saddledome, in Calgary
was built for the 1988 Olympics.
very cool place
(photo courtesy of google)

The Calgary Flames

Now mind you,

I know NOTHING about hockey rules

I know football

tight ends are my specialty (tee,hee)

BUT

at first I thought I'd just go for the Nachos

Me and Mr. Gorgeous were the lucky guests of some neighbors up the road

and

let me tell you

refreshments at a sporting event

pretty much could clean out my 401K

here is Sandi buying her 50/50 tickets

what's that you ask

well a Hockey Lottery of sorts

You buy "x" amount of tickets

and in the middle of the 3rd period

they do a drawing

by that time the amount had accumulated to over $60,000

Score that baby

that would mean the winner gets 1/2 of that amount

I was kinda hoping she'd win

(then maybe she'd reimburse us for the refreshments..tee,hee)

We had some tickets too

but our odds for winning

were as good as Rick Perry running for President.

warming up

the Zamboni....refreshing up the ice

gotta love that word, fun to say

kinda like how I love to say Rutabaga

National Anthem time

"we stand on guard for Thee"

Calgary is THE FLAMES
so every now and then, Flames of Fire would erupt

This is not a good photo of how cool that is

and when they score

(which apparently hasn't been too often yet this year)

A BIG SHOT OF FIRE

erupts from the ceiling

HOLY PUCK

it was awesome.

Hockey Fans in Canada are Rabid

love it

I love Rabid

even though I didn't know the rules

I was "into it"

cause that's how I role

and the fights....whoopeee, crazy wild

Me and Mr. Gorgeous

being Rabid....well, me anyway

I gravitate toward "crazy"

so....here it's been 2 years now since I moved here

I've

ate perogies

poutine

said "eh" a bunch of times

frozen my arse off

seen the Northern Lights

been pulled over by the RCMP

BUT

now it's official

I'm bonafide Canadian

HOCKEY BABY

THE CALL

2011-11-09T10:01:00.000-08:00

I have written, torn up and rewritten this many times ,trying to find a way

to put it all together

My call

came 11-11-10

at 6:43 a.m.

from my daughters house, at at time when you KNOW,normally
a call would not be made

It was one of my sons

"mom, it's Matt, he's gone"

A phone call that made my legs so weak

I felt they could not hold me up

that I would fall

A phone call that brought me to my knees

in shock and pain

in prayer for understanding, questions, strength

A call that my son was gone

A call that changed my life Without preparation or consent.

My husband and I quickly packed a bag

I wasn't even aware of what I put in, and what I needed

We made the 16 hour drive to Utah

straight through

my husband said it was a long grueling 16 hours

to me, I was not even concious of the time
I was lost in thought of a little boy, who became a man
and is now gone

I kept thinking

Why hadn't I felt him going.There should have been some message

from his spirit

some disturbance in the daily order of things.
something??

my eyes felt bruised from all the tears
tears carry many different melodies over the course of our lives

And so came the preparations of a funeral

all our family members came up with

beautiful tributes

we bonded in deeper ways then we had before

And the rest of us survive....somehow

and through it all MANY LESSONS are learned

you know that old saying

it would be sad to have the experience..and not learn the lesson

(any small measure of a lesson)

and what did I learn

that I certainly am NOT alone in this sacred fraternity

there are many of you

who have suffered greater things then me

in this sacred experience called death

I have been learning from you

here are a few things I want to remember:

1. DO NOT hesitate to go to a viewing if you can. I had so many people I never expected to see who showed up

and they will ALWAYS be remembered for that

people (you know who you are) who I didn't even know

who cared enough, for me, to come

yup, blogging friends I had not yet met

but will be forever bonded to in this act of love

2. Don't worry about trying to find the right things to say. There ARE NO right things to say. A hug is sufficient: body language that says "I can't Rescue you, but I can sit with you."

3. Acts of service, we had so much food brought over to us. Ann brought over this amazing chicken soup that we have lovingly named Matt's soup. Flowers, plants, cards.

I had neighbors and friends even go so far as to give me

something soothing as lotions, perfumes, bath products

(did you know you can do your best crying in the shower)

Think outside the box. Maybe babysit for someone for a few hours so they can get out and have some quiet time for themselves.

My daughters house became ground zero as we called it

so, her aunt (my sis) and her daughters

who live far away and were unable to come

sent her a gift certificate for Merry Maids

someone to clean up her house after all that chaos

Remember, what may seem to you like some small thing

becomes a monumental thing to the one who is grieving

So now, after a year

we will each celebrate our special memories of him

Sister Lauriette (the Nun I met in Ottawa this past summer) said

in a letter to me

Memories are inscribed in our hearts like a photo

ha ha, don't let that innocent face fool you

He was full of mischief and adventure and FUN

He will be forever remembered by his young children

His daughter wrote this and left it on the kitchen table

Now don't tell me that doesn't bring a tear to your eye

Each day, me...all of us who loved him

will try and move towards light

there may be some darkness in the wings

but if we open our spirit to it

light will find it's way in

this poem was read at Matt's funeral

ring the bells that still can ring,

forget your perfect offering

there is a crack in everything

that's how the light gets in

-Leonard Cohen-

sometimes, when I see his face, unexpectedly, it takes my breath away

Now I will try to heal

Healing does not mean being all well

it may take a lifetime

it's like a chronic illness

it's not terminal....just feels like it sometimes

I don't want to remain bitter for what I sometimes feel are

unanswered prayers

pleadings

Because.........Right Now

I don't know WHY

Matthew Recieved The Call

his call home

IF YOU BUILD IT

2011-11-01T15:58:00.000-07:00

THEY WILL COME

IN OUR CASE, THEY WILL STAY IN

We spent the larger part of this summer Fencing

we had fences to replace

and new ones to build

this is the OLD fencing, barbwire

it's kinda nasty

can hurt animals if they get caught in it

your cloths get caught in it when you try to climb through

We use a Kinder, Gentler wire (tee,hee)

nice and smooth

can climb through easily (which I do a lot, climb through fences)

See those staple/nail thingys (spoken like a true rancher eh)

well Mr. Gorgeous pounds them in just enough to set them

and I follow behind him and finish nailing them all the way in

That's a lot of nails city slickers

my wrists were pretty sore after a day of pounding

all the wires need bracing

this is kind of lopsided, but I was trying to get an angle of the fence

we did 1/4 of a mile going up our road to

KEEP THE FREAKING COWS IN

we lease some of our property to cows

Next is all the Gates that had to go in

(sheesh I didn't even mention all the Posts that have to go in First)

We even had to build a corral for said freaking cows.

more nails, (these ones 6 inches long) more gates, sore wrists

BUT

we are done

now we can keep in what we need, and keep out what we don't

and just spend some time looking at these

then, as of yesterday, trying to appreciate THIS

Nah. not thinking I'm much into appreciating cold and snow

Guess I need to find a new way of looking at some things

(rose colored glasses perhaps?)

Or maybe just some big goofy yellow ones

with attitude

to "change my attitude"

another photo of my cute grand kids

LIGHTEN UP

2011-10-27T15:34:00.000-07:00

I hate it when Mr. Gorgeous says that to me

I'll be all upset about something

LEGIT

and he says "lighten up"

Oh, I'll lighten up alright, as soon as I pull my foot out of your sexy behind

(ok, got that out)

but hey

I decided for this post

I WILL LIGHTEN UP

nothing serious

so I just have some stuff to show you

and tell you about

FIRST....PLANTS HATE ME

See droopy.....see death

My plants usually START off perky and thriving

then they turn against me

I've talked to them

I play music for them

country, Lady GaGa, Barbara Streisand, Il Divo,

what next??, what do you want from me? Dolphin music

Therefore, I will do THIS instead

I just went out into the field, and picked up some Oats that the farmer had laying around

and

just go into the Other field, and gather up some wheat

no watering, music, or care required

Next, I am in love with THIS

cherry and chili....are you serious !!!

a little bit of sweet

a little bit of spice

ahhh...just like my love life

or how about this

know what this is

well this summer, Mr. Gorgeous and I bought a whole bunch of jalapenos

from the Farmers Market

we sliced them, dried them....then ground them

VOILA....our own SPICY seasoning.

mix it with some sour cream and I'm in Heaven

I like it HOT

we love to go riding around, just for the heck of it

Lucy, our Diva Dog

always sticks her head in the seat belt

(smart dog)

on one of our escapades we came across This

YUP

some farmer with a great sense of humor

had hats nailed into over 2 miles of fence posts.

how fun is that

shhhh....but I think I have a few hats of my hubby's I'd like to put there

SO LASTLY

I love this

a granddaughter

taking a stand

an approach I need to develop

Bring it on World........I'm Ready for Ya

so there you have it

I lightened up

BETWEEN THE LINES

2011-10-17T14:54:00.000-07:00

OK, don't turn away from me now

THIS isn't a SAD post

nope

MATTHEW FINALLY HAS HIS HEADSTONE PLACED

I am so happy it is there now

"unhappiness can't stick in a persons soul when it's slick with tears"

Sure I'll cry when I see it

'supposed to do that

Last winter when I visited his grave, I couldn't quite find the spot as it wasn't marked

The Marker was GONE

I think my daughter thought she was going to have to sedate me as I was so upset that this little marker was missing.

you can bet your sweet bippy, I called the cemetery place and "expressed a few Un-christian" words of disapproval

(this photo was taken over Memorial Day, when they FIXED the problem)

so finally NOW, Matthew has THIS

(my sweet DIL sent the photo to me)

That there's My boy folks

(if you are wondering about the building on the headstone, it is the Salt Lake City Temple, of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints where he and his wife were married)

So here's the deal

it has his name

the date of his birth...and the date of his death

WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW, IS WHAT TOOK PLACE BETWEEN THE LINES

between the birth and death part

it is not just , dot, dot, dot, dot

NO....there was LIFE THERE

a whole lot of amazing, talent, caring, fun, son, brother, husband, father

I will make sure people know about that part

I will share those stories with his children

Just as we should for all of those people who passed on before us

They lived lives worth knowing about.

I don't know about you, but I have always loved walking through cemeteries (especially old ones)

(this was an amazing one we visited on my trip to Ottawa)

I love reading the names and the dates.

I love "wondering" about those laid there

sometimes I'd like to make up stories to myself of what went on before

Which makes me think, we need to make sure OUR own story is more powerful then what someone might imagine

only

we don't get to see "what is between the lines"

I am going to be buried here

(or if I were to be cremated, I 'd be scattered here...and there...and everywhere as I like to "scatter sunshine, everywhere I go")

It is a little cemetery in the area where my parents live

basically just in a cow pasture

(yeah you heard me)

The "locals" keep it up, mowed etc

I will be happy here

my dad has spent time mowing the grass here

and you know who else is here that I can "hang" with

well, let me show you

My brothers little boy who died at age 6

of a congenital heart disease

My grandpa and grandma

Grandpa who could whistle any tune, while I'd ride in the truck with him checking on the livestock

and Grandma, who made the best "homemade ANYTHING", and sat me on her knee as a young girl and told me the story

of The Three Little Kittens Who Lost Their Mittens

and

My Great Grandpa

(his wife is laid beside him)

yeah the tombstone is old and has lichen growing on it

but I'll tell you

there are some incredible stories between the lines

a great grandma (who my daughter was named after) who came to Canada as a young bride of 17

who grew the most lovely flowers on their ranch (some still trying to thrive today) as we (our family) still owns that property,

still lay there , are some rock footpaths that led to their house.

and then

My Great-great grandparents

Their headstone is newer (replaced)

as there was a historical celebration, a centennial, of those who came across the prairies of America in handcarts

for religious freedoms

a new beginning

a new heritage

these grandparents of mine came across with everything they owned in a handcart and on their backs

burying loved ones along the way

with very little markings to remember them by
great-great grandma who use to send her kids to the cellar
when the Indians came
and she'd exchange with them a sack of flour
praying they'd leave with her scalp intact

so in this little cemetery is where my parents will be laid

and me

(but I have been threatening my family that I want the Morman Tabernacle Choir to sing at my funeral ...or perhaps Il Divo...and a life sized Angel at my head with a spot light on it , and a brochure people can pick up, so they know what was "between the lines" ......just kidding of course)

On My headstone it will read

SUVATE

(Comanche word for "it is finished")

???what do you want yours to read???

I am happy with that

I think I'll conduct cemetery evening bunko nights (tee,hee)

but one thing I KNOW

when we bury someone we love, we must also bury a part of our heart

but we should not bemoan this loss

our hearts

are perhaps all they can take with them

Matthew Purnell Doman

I love you with all my heart

and I hope I can carry the story of your life,

the life between the lines

with me forever.

(Matt's family on a trip to Hawaii, wife, son and daughter)

SEEING DEATH AS THE END OF LIFE

IS LIKE SEEING THE HORIZON AS THE END OF THE OCEAN

(David Searls)

That, is my healing Balm

and it makes me happy

SCARS AND CELEBRATIONS

2011-10-11T17:57:00.000-07:00

That is a weird combination don't ya think

but, I'll explain

Today marks an 11th month anniversary since Matthew passed away

but, THIS post will not be all about that

however, it did leave some deep SCARS

Boy do I miss his handsome face

That nightmarish phone call came at 6:43 a.m

from my daughters house

I KNEW something had to be wrong

as she'd never call that early

NOW, when the phone rings at a time I don't

think it should, my heart races

panic sets in

no matter how hard I try to be calm.

a definite scar

When I was a young girl

I had totally different plans and dreams for my life

I always thought "bad" things happened to "other"

people

People who really had no names ,no meaning to me

Thought I was invincible

WRONG

I imagine that was the same for many of you

life sometimes leaves us with scars

I feel like I have barbedwire around my heart

so that everytime you breath, inhale, exhale....it hurts

Maybe I am not so strong as many of you have given me credit for

but I am trying

I want to cut away the barbedwire

I try

I read "inspirational quotes" every day

(heck I even joined a source that sends you One inspirational quote a day

I read it, I see it

but it is not quite getting through the barbedwire

Still on my "happy pills"

cause as they say, .."a pill a day, keeps the shrinks away"

or is it "a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine so down?"

I am easily confused.

My blogs used to be FUNNY

I want my FUNNY back

BUT

on a happier note

a Celebration

Me and Mr. Gorgeous just celebrated our 2nd anniversary.

Yup, two years, and he's still keeping me around.

We decided to spend the day in Banff National Park

very cool place

was beautiful this time of year

snow gathering in the mountains

the fall leaves

Love it.

So Magestic

rugged

We did a little shopping in town

and I thought these Busses were awesome

We didn't see any bears this day however.

Anyway, I guess if we live long enough

Scars will heal

and there will be Many things to Celebrate

I like this country song by Canadian artist

Ian Tyson

called The Wonder Of It All

(chorus)

There's this place we're gonna ride

Up where the Rimrod meets the night

We'll go hand in hand

Rid'in through the purple star light

And the Coyote on the wind

Sends his lonely lovers call

We'll hold each other close

In the Wonder, of it All

AND SO, THAT IS LIFE

NO MATTER WHAT

IT'S THE WONDER OF IT ALL

IF WISHES WERE FISHES....

2011-10-04T12:08:00.000-07:00

If wishes were fishes

we'd have a good fry

been thinking about blogs lately

why do you do it

what kind of "specialty" do you have

there are cooking blogs, craft blogs, DYI blogs

spiritual blogs, yup, even sex blogs

my blog is just about MOI

little ol'me and life, and how it affects me.

so those of you who come to visit

THANK YA

because sometimes

life just isn't a bubble of excitement

SO I'VE BEEN DOING SOME WISHING

Not for world peace and all that heavy stuff

just my stuff.

don't you just wish those people voted as Most Beautiful would just grow a pimple or something.

I wish that when I went to Costco, they had all the cashier tills open, hells bells, they have 14, and only open 6, what the heck

I wish hospitals weren't so "hospitally" (medicine smells, rotten food, no quiet)

Wish I had more room/space for seasonal decorations. I love seasonal decorations. This is all I have outside (and very little inside) I used to have a lot more sunflowers in this pot, but my dog destroyed most of them last year. Also, around here, if you don't have things BOLTED down, they probably would end up at your house, since the wind blows so much. Seriously, our BBQ is bungie corded to one of the pillars on the deck.

(and incase you are wondering, the old pot is screwed into the table)

I wish I could get thin by just watching exercise videos..like osmosis or something (with a bag of salt and vinegar chips on my lap)

I wish Health food tasted as good as Junk food.

my sister makes me drink this when I go visit her

It's wheat grass

seriously, wheat grass

This is how she grows it.

and this

is how she prepares it. Throw it in a blender, add some water

then "down the hatch"

so if you want to know what it tastes like

pick up some of your freshly cut lawn clippings

throw it in the blender with water

yeah....you get the idea. (gag)

but truly, it has tons of health benefits.

I wish I could fall asleep at night as easily as my husband. I lay there thinking I need to solve all the worlds problems

how do you "quiet your mind"

I REALLY wish I noticed my t-shirt was on backwards, BEFORE the end of the day. Couldn't figure out what kept tickling my neck, duh, shirt tag.

Which would explain, why I wish Blonde Jokes weren't so "spot on" with me.

I wish Winter wasn't so dang cold. Why can't winter be more like Fall, Chilly, but not cold. Sure you can drop a few snowflakes here and there

but overall....stop with the freezing temps. already. I am going to have to look for something like this.

that's genuine Buffalo my friends

nothing "faux" about this

I'll have to find me a prettier hat however.

and Lastly

I wish you could all come over for a little visit, we could sit around and discuss our "wish list"

and laugh

and hug

I'll make an apple pie.

well, actually I'll probably just buy one.

go ahead and share a wish with me, it's not like blowing out a candle in that if you tell it won't come true

cause hells bells (did I say that already)

wishes are just.......wishes.

BUILD ALL YOUR ROADS ON TODAY....

2011-09-28T18:36:00.000-07:00

.....Because.....

tomorrow's ground is

too uncertain for plans

and futures have a way of

falling down in mid-flight

After a while you learn

that even sunshine burns if you get too much

It's time for fall

whether we are ready or not

because LIFE never waits for us to be ready

we just have to be able to meet it

when it happens

I love this sunset down our road from a week ago
(this is all our property)

so peaceful

so much beauty

such beautiful colors

MY ROAD

Makes me so thankful

there are many FALLS in our lives

whether it be the season, or changes in our own lives

For the very first time since I moved here, my Dad was able to come with my sister

and visit me

Of course I had to get a picture of him

with Mr. Gorgeous

and one of our horses

Dad just turned 82

He is reaching past the "fall period" of his life

his roads are changing

he needs to be ready to meet them
when I asked him "how do you feel about turning 82"
he said
"Well, at least I am still on the green side of the grass."

He, Me, and my sister and brother spent a week with my mother

who had to go into surgery for a stomach tumor
(still awaiting for tests of cancer?)

A hard time for sure

We spent a lot of time in this room

Waiting

worrying

dad

when people are in the hospital (as many of you must know)

they really don't necessarily feel like visiting

they just want to KNOW you are there....close by

reminds me of a lovely quote by Piglett to Winnie the Pooh

"Piglett sidled up to Pooh from behind ..'Pooh', he whispered

'Yes, Piglett'

'Nothing', said Piglett taking Pooh's paw. ' I just wanted to be sure of you'.."

Our family is a little odd sometimes (go figure)

and our sense of humor

might not always be totally understood by some

but we get through things by laughter

and simpleness

one night after visiting mom, and driving to my brothers in Calgary where we were staying

Jackee turns to my dad and says

"now dad, don't go having a heart attack or anything tonight

cause that would really just complicate things"

I thought I was going to die laughing.

but, the good news is

Mom's surgery went well

it will still be many weeks of recovery at home

till she feels whole

ready to meet the roads ahead of her

me and my siblings, we love her

certainly NOT ready to "let go"

I told her, please pinky swear with me you won't die in the winter

and certainly NOT this year

bruised but NOT broken

........so you plant your own garden.......

and decorate your own soul

instead of waiting

for someone to bring you flowers

and you LEARN

that you really can endure

that you really are strong

and you really do have worth

(Vernoica Shoffstall)

also, sweet wishes and prayers go out to my friend Claudie

the one I visited on my magical trip to Ontario

her sweet 92 years old mother is extremely ill

waiting for Gods gentle hand to take her

remember her in your prayers

because

isn't that why we are all HERE

to help each other

when we need each other MOST

love you Claudie

NO MATTER WHERE YOU GO......THERE YOU ARE

2011-09-19T13:58:00.000-07:00

I don't really know where that saying came from

but my DAD used to always say it.

Where have your summer JOURNEYS taken you

over bridges

(Mr. Gorgeous and Lucy)

exploring fields

(two grandaughters, Loo-Dog, Grace,lace and Dodger)

Racing...for fun or survival?

(2 more grandaughters, K-Doll and Kyleen)

walking new paths with your besties

(one of my besties...my sister)

hiking...reaching for the top

(my kids and grand kids)

perfecting a skill

(grandson #12, Tyler)

OR

pondering where you are...and why

(Matt's family)

seeing where you started

(me and my sister in the back)

and how far you've come

(me, plus the increased butt size)

So, where have your journey's led you
in what ways did the events of THIS summer affect you

“The moon and sun are travelers through eternity. Even the years wander on. Whether drifting through life on a boat or climbing toward old age leading a horse, each day is a journey, and the journey itself is home.”

― Bashō

Let's hope as we journey into Fall....and eventually Winter
that we become the Captain of that trip
Whether the journey is good or bad, fun or crappy
boring or overwhelming

we succeed ....because ultimately
THE ONLY JOURNEY IS THE ONE WITHIN
(Rilka)

P.s. I may be missing for a bit, as my mom is going in for surgery tomorrow to have a stomach tumor removed, and I will be spending a lot of time in the hospital with her.
God Bless you mommy

ACT THREE

2011-09-13T15:30:00.000-07:00

HEY EVERYONE........I'M 60

YUP

ENTERING ACT THREE OF MY LIFE.

I heard this from Jane Fonda a long time ago, that she figures LIFE is divided up into Three Acts. Like a Play.

What bigger play is there............then your life's story

Act One.............birth to 30

ah yes, the beginning. Your formative years. Where everything seems like it will last forever and where everything seems Possible.

The first act of a play, is set up to "introduce" the story. Get people interested.

BEGINNINGS

Act Two.....30 to 60

Now you need to "develop" the story. Lay out the reasons, the events, the feelings, of WHY things happened they way they did

leaving a little room for...........suspense?? the unexpected

there is a lot happening in this Act

It is deeper then Act one, because now you come to understand that sometimes things DON'T last forever, and things may not be Quite as possible as you thought. Oh yes, you are not as invincible as you thought.

NOW the reader (or audience) is hooked.

Act Three.......60, to death. (perhaps 90?)

This is the Act where the "story" has to make some sense. Where events, feelings and all experiences start to mean something.

You have to TIE all the parts together.

so.............that by the END of the story, there is the climax, the "ahhh, now I get it" or the

WOW, was that ever interesting/crazy/ amazing

I AM IN ACT THREE

I certainly HOPE I can start to tie in all the pieces of my life. Understand the Why's

Strengthen the CORE of who this story is about

become meaningful

become relevant

find peace

YUP, that is my journey now...............hopefully until I am 90

MEET MY GRANDMOTHER

you know how they say 60 is the new 50's (or 50 is the new 40's etc)

Well here in this photo my grandma is holding me

She was probably 40 in this photo

YET........in those days, 40 was.....well 40.

I LOVE THIS LADY

yet, she looks so much older then we do/did at 40

her life was harder

she didn't have

Suzanne Sommers Thigh Master

jeans

Dr. Oz's gazillion vitamin suggestions and health alerts

Zumba

Kenny Rogers and Dolly Partons face lift motivations

botox

Kim Kardashians butt implants

mascara

TAMPONS

pedicures, manicures, spas

sunscreen

Spanks

hair dryers, blow dryers, flat irons

liposuction, tummy tucks, breast implants

teeth bleaching

NONE OF THAT

she was a hard working farm wife, who, well............looked like this at 40

but you know what she was

SOFT SHOULDERS TO CUDDLE ON

so we ask ourselves, WHAT is 60 supposed to look like

well, considering all those things above at our disposal

HARD TO SAY

Aren't we LUCKY

Here is a photo of me at 17..........this is what I looked like when Mr. Gorgeous met me

when He...We fell in love

Actually still in Act One

Here is a photo of me and my high school girlfriend

she is only 10 days older then me

She introduced me to Mr. Gorgeous, through her brother

We are now 60

So Now

really

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT

in Act Three

But I'll work on it

make it interesting

relevant

meaningful

find peace

This is me standing before "my mountain"

Old Chief

It is very close to where my parents live

WHERE GRANDMA GREW UP

I think I'll have many mountains yet to climb

conquer

defeat

face up to

but in the end

I REALLY JUST WANT TO BE

SOFT SHOULDERS TO CUDDLE ON

and p.s

This is what Mr. Gorgeous gave me for my birthday

A FAMILY RING

each of my five children........birthstone

jewels

depicting the JEWELS they really are in my life.

all of them

SUMMERTIME.....AND THE LIVING IS EASY

2011-09-02T12:34:00.000-07:00

Oh Blessed Summertime.

I wait and wait all winter long for the gifts of Summer, then Wham, it is gone. Faster then you can spit Watermelon Seeds.

This is the last writing, I will have of my summer activities.

I hope you will bear with me through these photos........cause YOU just think they are photos.

Not so my dear blogger friends

These are not mere photos, but Relationships, Love, Bonding, Roots.

My daughter and her 2 girls, came from Salt Lake City to visit me for about 10 days.

They got to stay in the New Cabin we just bought

A Cabin waiting to be filled with memories and mischief.

So say Howdy.

We only got this cabin about a week before they arrived, so it is in it's Virgin stages.

give me some time to spruce it up.

What do you do with two spunky grandaughters during a visit to the Country

Well..........you have wiener roasts of course.

And, it would be interesting to know if your marshmallow roasts turn out like THIS

My sister and Loo-Dog (that's her nickname)

thought they'd get creative with theirs

Then you better go swimming at the creek to wash all that goo off.

This creek is historic

in my life

I have swam in it since I could walk, and hunted drift wood along it's shores to smoke

(another story)

There is a rope on the rock wall that the kids love to hang onto and jump into the water.

Or how about a nice lazy ride down the river.

Mom caught a Frog. Holy freaking city girl, I couldn't believe she grabbed onto that slimy thing.

But her response is, It's a Mothers Duty. guess I fell short on that duty, I ain't touching no frog.

forget snow angels, it's summertime

besides, young'uns don't seem to mind a little sand in the crotch

Forget the mega bucks you spend at the spa for mud treatments.

Here, it's free

besides young'uns don't seem to mind a little mud in their crotch

Can't come visit me without going to

THE GREAT CANADIAN BARN DANCE

Loo-Dog lives for this treat

She picks out her outfit months in advance

and was a little miffed with her mom for forgetting her cowgirl earrings.

Of course grandma has to join in and do a little two-stepping.

I know, you don't have to say it, I look pretty pathetic trying to shake my booty

But I did it for my Grandaughter ---OK, get over it.

Welcome to the Naughty Pit. Any misbehaving and you could end up down there.

and there are spiders, and creepy crawlies

and pit monsters.

(seems pretty effective)

actually it was my grandma's old root cellar. I can't believe she'd go down there for her canned goods and spuds and homemade rootbeer.

Went for a Trail Ride.

Aren't those Rocky Mountains beautiful.

After it was all over, I turned around and there was Loo-Dog, doing her own dismount

On the wrong side of the horse.

I see rodeo queen written all over this gal.

This is at Waterton National Park.

It is amazingly beautiful there if you are looking for a vacation adventure.

There was a sign that said
Stay Away from Bears.

phoooey...sign, schmine.

ok, so it's not a real bear.

We are very creative.
I heart my family.

Red Rock Canyon

It is so fun to hike around there

and the water is COLD

Ahhhhhhh

The gals wanted to go on a canoe ride, or the water paddle boats

I put a nix-nay on that

Grandma isn't looking to have a stroke today, with all that exerted effort, rowing and paddling.

Can't come visit me without going on a hike

OK, so I did consent to walking and heavy breathing.

I LOVE this mountain

It is called Old Chief

it is actually in Montana....that is how close my folks live to the boarder

FYI....I have climbed the back side of this mountain and stood on the very top

which is only about 5 feet across.

another story for another post

I really like this photo of Grace-Lace

Hay ----how are ya

ok that was cheesy.

Mr Gorgeous was excited to take them on a Wagon Ride.

Roll'en, Roll'en Roll'en......Rawhide.

So there you have it

another Summer packed full of memories

I heard this saying once,

if you don't know where you came from, how will you know where you are going.

Roots are important

Families are Forever.

Closing the gate for now

Ya'll come back now, ya hear.

(excuse me, grandma has to slip into a corner now and cry a little)

CINDERELLA.....PART DEUX, and the giving up of the slipper

2011-08-25T15:43:00.000-07:00

if you haven't read part 1, go down a post, you must!!!

Life itself, is the Most Wonderful Fairy Tale

Hans Christian Anderson

Here is the end of my fairy tale vacation

Claudie, spraying us all with a bit of fairy dust before heading out for our day.

Even the river was sparkling that day, like it should in a fairy tale.

I totally must put up a photo of Julie (Miss Juliet) who did the majority of our picture taking

it is what she does

takes classes and everything

I LOVE how she dresses so funky, she was my fashionista

One more photo from our day in Montreal

They give horse drawn carriage rides and all the girls wanted a photo on the carriage

PINK is Claudies Signature color (kinda like the movie Steel Magnolia)

I took a pass on it............HECK, I ride in horse drawn carriages

all . the. time.

horses and cowboys..........It's what I do.

but not in a dress, and um, not pink

Julie was the only single gal of the bunch. So it was only appropriate that she get her photo taken with the waiters from the restaurant, remember in my last post

the ones who Loved us and ended up giving each of us a rose

ahhhhhh

Here we are doing what girls ALWAYS need to do

potty

waiting in line

CC, Miss Bee, me, Claudie

Claudies sweet hubby, our personal chef the duration of most of this trip

set up an OUTSIDE MOVIE NIGHT

yup....we all grabbed a blanky, and watched a movie outside in her yard

it was like a drive in theatre.......without the necking

well.........I didn't really check on Claudie and her hubby

We watched Gregory Peck (swooon) and Audrey Hepburn

in ROMAN VACATION

A Classic Black and White movie

Next day......we went to what is known as 1000 Islands

Part of it is in New York State.........holy freaking Big Apple (without actually being in the Big Apple)

I made it into New York State

It was an awesome place to see, as people would actually BUY an island, just a small one most of them, and build a cabin, house, whatever as their SUMMER HOME

What???... a summer home

we are talking some serious cash here

instead of 3 car garages, they had 3 boat garages as the only way to access them is by boat

It is on the Saint Lawrence River

This photo is what is called the smallest International Bridge in the world

on one side of the Bridge (where the house is) is Canada

and the other side is USA

(I wonder if the owner needs a passport to cross his bridge)

Seriously, it was amazing to see all these places built on , well, 1000 Islands............

Here is Julie and Claudie mapping out our plans for the day

or thinking.....crap, we better delete This photo

We crossed into New York State on a Ferry Boat. We wanted to see Boldt Castle

It was amazing

Just Like a Fairy Tale

maybe like the one Cinderella visited

built in the early 1900's

Yes, it was built on an Island. Mr. Boldt, being the Prince Charming he was in his day, built this for his wife who he Adored

but she died

(like in a classic fairy story eh)

before he had it finished, so he walked away never to return

It started to deteriorate, and NY State has been restoring it

here is a picture of one of the parlors

Like I said, he was super duper in love with his wife

and had many many things in the house built with Hearts around it

He EVEN had part of the island cut away to be somewhat in the shape of a heart

So here is me and Claudie, doing our Heart thing

in honor of their love

cause WHERE would we be without love

I wonder if I can convince Mr. Gorgeous to build me a corral in the shape of a heart??

After a full day of the Castle, we headed back on the Ferry Boat. CC was a little pooped

Unfortunately I have NO pictures of our Italian Night that Chef Randy had waiting for us when we got back. When we got back to Claudies, he had Dean Martin music playing outside for us

and fixed us a HUGE dinner

It was, well, manufique (or however you spell it)

He spent all day preparing it for us

(I think he is in love with Claudie)

He made the bread that we dipped in olive oil and balsamic vinegar

while sipping the vino....and listening to Dean-o

then served up the Eggplant Parmesean

then the chicken/pasta dish

with Tiramisu for dessert

Randy (and her son Colt) were just like Gus-Gus from the

movie Cinderella. I adore them.

Next day....into our nations capital .....Ottawa

our capital building

once again, kinda like Montreal, it had amazing architecture

We took a drive down a street known as Embassy Street.

well.....I might have made that up

cause I don't remember the name of the street but it is where all the Embassy buildings are

from other countries

see this one of Kuwait

it was pretty cool to see them

I didn't say anything terroristic as we drove by....I tried not to make eye-contact

that's what they say to do ya know

We were actually on our way to see Claudie's moms cousin

who is a Nun

by the name of Sister Lauriette

Claudie said she had been excited to think of meeting us

so we drove to the place where she lives

and took a little tour around while we waited for her

We went into the chapel area, and Miss Bee took a seat in the confessional booth

Claudie went in and told her

"Miss Bee, we just don't have that kind of time right now to listen to all your transgressions"

tee,hee......sorry Miss Bee, couldn't resist

I think Claudie was feeling a little bad about that

so she and Julie decided to "tap into" their spiritual side

Um....Julie. are you trying not to snicker??

Finally, we hooked up with Sister Lauriette

she is 90 years old and is very witty

I loved how she referred to all of us by where we came from

when addressing us, she'd say "so....Wendy from Calgary"

or "Jeanne from North Carolina"

it was very sweet

sometimes she'd have to pause as she is French speaking

and of course she'd talk to us in English

remember the autograph books I told you about in Part 1

well, we all took our books to her so she could write in them

Claudie had previously told her about the passing of my son

and I was very moved

to tears

by what she wrote in my book

She just made us laugh

filled us with joy that day

which goes to show

you don't need to wave a magic wand to find beautiful people in your lives

CC enjoying one of her stories

Back to Claudies

not only is she a lover of people

but she loves animals, and rescues dogs

she has SEVEN of them at her house

As is what happens in all fairy tales

there comes an ending

on our last day there, we all put on our penoirs she bought for us

and played, just like little girls do, in dress up

which goes to show

we don't really need to ever Grow old

cause like I said in the first post, we ranged in ages from 72 to 50

I thought I'd grab Julies camera and see if I could "capture a moment"

We had Jeanne pose as the actress Marlene Dietrich

famous from the 1930's

which was hysterical actually

She was even holding a piece of the DRIFTWOOD I brought

for each of them to smoke

Oh yeah, I had to bring a little country to the castle

they thought I'd lost my mind, and that maybe I'd smoked a few to many pieces of wood in my day

And so it Ends

Thanks Claudie for being my Fairy Godmother

Now the time has come when the clock has to strike midnight

I have to return to my own Prince Charming

It was fun to squeeze my bunioned foot into that glass slipper for a week

And as I dust my own Rustic Castle, and hear the coyotes and the hawks call

perhaps

somewhere there'll be an echo of

Bibbity Boppity Boo

I hope there is a fairy tale awaiting all of you someday

CINDERELLA GOT TO GO TO THE BALL

2011-08-16T20:32:00.000-07:00

I am back. I know it has been a month, but as I mentioned on my last post, I have been celebrating life. Here is the story. I took 600 photos, and will try to spare you from all of them....YOU'RE WELCOME

Part One

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams and live the life you've imagined. (anonymous)

my dream vacation

This is the lady behind it all, Claudie. She has spent nearly a year
planning her event.....called SUMMER BREEZE

AND

like Cinderella.......I was invited

Let me introduce you to the other Summer Breeze Gals

JULIE....From Vancouver, British Columbia

CC....(Catherine) from Georgia

Miss Bee....(Deborah) from North Carolina

Jeanne......also from North Carolina

all these photos were taken from my trip. I had to borrow from Jeanne for hers, but I tried to "catch" some of their personality. We promised each other to only post flattering pics.

We are all blogging pals

My FIRST time in meeting them

What an eclectic group we were. Ranging in ages from 72 to 50, different upbringings, faiths, experiences

and YET

Joy and Sorrow.....Pain and Pleasure has sat at all of our tables

Claudies place was truly like a fairy tale. Everything there was so fanciful, fun, colorful, and almost magical

The little cottage in the back is for guests.

This is an outdoor shower. It has a BIG pool at the back. Oh yeah, we spent time there. Ontario is hot and humid.

Claudie even went to extraordinary efforts to make our rooms just "perfect" for us. She took the bedspreads off the hotel beds and put on some lovely ones from her own home. She tried to decorate every ones room according to their personalities, styles, and likes.

Being the country girl I am, I had a country patchwork quilt on my bed. She knows I love ladybugs, so she had these lights put around the mirror. The little picture on the desk was from her.

She made huge paper flowers and streamers that hung from the ceilings. Since her favorite color is pink, she even put pink toilet paper in our bathrooms, along with lovely soaps.

Not to mention the room fridges stocked with soda, juice, cheese, chocolate

a simple hotel room was transformed

befitting Cinderella

Meet her husband Randy. He did ALL the cooking for us and he is a chef supreme-o.

(he is opening some of the gifts we brought for him)

We all brought each other wonderful surprises, gifts. My whole carry on luggage was full of gifts

and even more full going home

Here is the bunch of us enjoying one of his breakfasts. Claudie's kitchen is like a doll house. I adored it.

Me and Claudie enjoying one of Chef Randy's meals outside.

yes, that is a river that runs along her back yard (sigh)

We did a lot of This..celebrate

and we also "danced to the music"

Since she had a pool in the back yard......she made sure we understood we would ALL be getting in, no matter if we still fit in our swimsuits. (or not)

so before getting ready for our first swim.....we had our "ah ha" meeting

get it out

tell everyone what we Hate about our bodies

but we also had to tell what we Loved about our bodies.

Guess which list was longer.

Now that they know of my still post pregnancy belly fat (youngest is 26), I guess I am ready for the Plunge

I am 5th one in

Even though I had 6 full days there, we were busy every day and still ran out of time

we went to Montreal...Oui

Old Montreal

It was like nothing I have ever seen before

Cobblestone streets, amazing architecture, shops, oh the food!!

Julie and CC seem happy about their room

just being friends who can hold hands

and be ok

cause that's what friends do

We all had autograph books (which was one of our many gifts)

Everywhere we stopped, we tried to get people to sign our books.

We'd paste paper souvenirs in them

Here is one of our waiters signing our books

Can I just say the French men....Oooola la

Before we left, all the waiters came over

and they left us each with a red rose they bought from a street lady

Did I mention..........Ooooo la la

We went for a walk along the pier and saw this sign.

Claudie, using her french charm

talked the owner into letting us get one for $5.00

MISTAKE

why...I'll tell ya why

Henna does not last or set like a real tattoo

and it was so hot and humid that evening

the slightest touch would rub it off

All we had them put on each of us was the words

SUMMER BREEZE

Well, I thought I'd get my sexy on, and have mine on my neck/chest area

So.....I am not really the french floozy that this photo looks like

I had to pull the shirt down so it wouldn't rub off

(that's my story and I'm sticking to it)

However, after all my efforts to protect it

by the end of the night it was a mess

It ended up looking like some broad who was getting laser treatments for a Bad Tattoo

Since it was such a muggy night, we all did a little dance in the fountain.

Sure, you're not supposed to

Whatever

(Claudie)

Not a bad photo for all us felons I guess. Poor Julie isn't in this photo as she was our official picture taker.

That water felt dang good for all us menopausal women

We took a little detour home. Went on a ferry boat ride. AGAIN, Claudie, using her irresistible charms, talked the captain down on the price

and

as it turned out.....he took us across 4 times just for fun

(it is only a 15 min. ride across the river)

One side of the river is Ontario, the other Quebec

(CC and Claudie)

Don't worry Jeanne, it's not that big of a river.

If you fall off, just paddle hard

Of course no trip to Canada would be complete without some POUTINE.

Eastern Canada makes the best

It is french fries covered with cheese curds and brown gravy

We only wanted one family order for our southern friends to try, but when they found out where we were all from

they gave us 2 for the price of 1

instead of only 1000 calories a mouthful, we got 2000

NICE

This is where I will leave you for now.

I am sure my carriage is about to turn into a pumpkin

enjoy this sunset from Claudies back yard

along the river

"a dream is a wish your heart makes"

stay tuned for part deux

that's french talk for two

STANDING IN THE TRUTH

2011-06-03T11:58:00.000-07:00

I am back. My trip to Utah to see my family is now over. Was it wonderful....YES.
So much to tell, yet not the words really to express my emotions and thoughts. Do you feel like that sometimes. You experience something, and it impacts you.......yet the "words" don't seem fitting somehow.

I thought, how can I share some of my experiences of the last 2 weeks that might be a little meaningful. Something maybe you can associate with.
I believe I was reminded of many TRUTHS on this visit. After this long cold winter and the death of my son, I think I imprisioned myself in grief and pity. Visiting my family again reminded me of the things I had put aside.
Now, it is time for me to Stand in the Truth. Life does go on. You make your own destiny and You are responsible for you own sense of Joy. Sometimes Truth is hard...as it makes us look at ourselves.....truth can only be avoided for so long before it has to be reckoned with.

So here is some of MY TRUTH through photos.

1. Relationships do not fade over time or because of distance. Truth: relationships only fade due to neglect. (me and one of my BFF's and Matt's wife)

2. We grow up. Our children grow up. Become adults. Truth: but we do not need to loose our child like qualities for love of life, adventure and fun. (my son Travis)

3. It is never too early to develop a Diva quality. Truth: We have our own sense of style and it doesn't have to be like everyone else. Be comfortable with ourselves. (grandaughter)

4. I live in a 950 square foot home in the country. Truth: I am lucky to have it. (pioneer home at the This is the Place Visitors Center in Salt Lake City)

5. Good to remember our ancestors and the hardships they endured. Truth: we are pretty much lazy and spoilt. Be grateful. (my daughter helping her neice)

6. Panning for Gold. Truth: money is hard to come by. Be frugal. Living out of our means is not going to bring you Wealth and happiness. (grandkids)

7. Enjoying a day at my grandson's baseball game (Matt's son) Truth: he is a superstar in his own right....he doesn't have to follow his dad's footsteps as we all chart our own.

8. Enjoying a night out with my girls....2 Daughters in Love and my daughter (at the end). Truth: they are beautiful, but we all will experience "aging" and the "girls will droop" and yet we can remain enchanting.

9. Going to the movie, not enough room in the SUV so son in law got stuck in the back. Truth: good to know you can put your SIL in his place (tee,hee) and he can still smile about it. None of us are too good to have to sit in the back sometimes, in many aspects of our lives.

10. We all carry wounds. (grandson). ouch. Truth: some of them show, and some of them don't. Some are physical and many are emotional. But they all heal eventually in their own time.

11. Grandaughter jumping for Joy. She is young, and only knows protection, love, and safety. Truth: we need to still find a way to jump for joy even though we age, our protection is jeopardized, feel unloved, and sometimes things are not so safe.

12. My grandson sporting a Justin Bieber look. Growing up oh so quickly. Truth: fads come and go, celebrities leave a small mark on life, yet Good Character lasts a lifetime. Don't hang on to unimportant things. Work on your own self-worth.

13. Matt's gravesite. We don't have the plaque picked out yet. I loved visiting him there on this trip. Truth: even though he is gone from us right now, I can still have my "one on one" talks with him (this time...he can't talk back, tee,hee) The love still grows, it doesn't end.

14. Family remains strong together. Uncle Travis helping Matt's daughter put her pinwheel in the ground. Families need to help each other, support each other. Be unified. That is TRUTH.

15. and lastly........... MY TRUTH: families are forever and there is Eternal Life.

That is what makes everything else we do and experience worthwhile.

(Matt's family)

Whatever your truths are, I hope you Stand Tall.