Monday, April 8, 2013


(yes I know, all my titles seem to be SONG oriented)

This may seem a little incohesive...
but after a conversation with my mom
I thought of this post

for those of you who have been reading my posts
you know my parents are not doing well
health wise
it is sad

up days....down days
but on one of the DOWN DAY conversations with my mom
she was feeling
What is the Sense of it all
for what purpose did I work all my life
YOUR DAD worked since he was 8 years old (yes)
and what do we have to show for it
to take with us

Understand, my parents have GREAT FAITH
and they KNOW
it's not about WHAT we take with us
cause as far as "material things"
that would be nothing

not so much What we take with us
but what did we leave behind
mom and I talked about that

   (photo from 50th wedding anniversary)

 (photo from 2004)


I won't go into the trials and struggles
of their situation now


but its about

Recently I received a photo from my son's wife
of their little 4 year old
who has just started T-ball

   the quality isn't that great
but it sure took me back in TIME

when all 4 of my sons played baseball
sports of all kinds
and yet
here it is again , repeating itself
a continuance of What WAS
a reminder
that life will go on and on and on
and it is important to dwell on the values, roots, foundations
of life


what you left behind was
a solid truth of what is
what will always be
and what once was

Children who do not know their past will never understand 
their future
(Christopher Columbus)        

It is a continuance

this is a photo of me and my grandparents

and they too
took NOTHING with them

but what they left behind
was invaluable

the lessons, the love, the legacy

Remember the history of our people
Everytime someone forgets, someone else disappears
(Alice Hoffman, author) 

so here I am
looking at myself, my life, my example

 with my 5 who left us TO SOON
What will I ultimately leave behind FOR THEM
(photo about 10 years old) 

Will they forgive my faults, shortcomings, failures
and instead
seek out the GOOD I tried to instill in them
the truths
(ha ha, I always told my kids, don't listen to what I said, listen to what I meant)  
by the same token
Don't always follow my footsteps
just Follow the truths I TOLD YOU ABOUT

I told you this would perhaps be a little
but stuff rolling around in my head here

is of greatest value
My parents LOVED me despite the possible
many ways I disappointed them 
they had to Re-Adjust THEIR dreams for me
to the dreams I had interpreted for myself
and accept that
and love me still

Same for my children
and grandchildren
take over the galaxy
yet....they will course their own way

but the TRUTHS and VALUES
will have been cemented in them....
(no matter how they may try and fight that)

I am thankful for children who love me
and Parents who have led me and guided me
and GRANDPARENTS who before all that
layed out the same "lifes map"

thankful for a husband who loves me
despite my whinning and  boob-a-loobing 

in the end
it's what we leave behind

(which as been changed from Rhianna's song, Shine like a Diamond)
Doman, being the last name of my sons 
and maiden name of my daughter   


and walk proud, confident, and assured
that what is now
was laid before you
Generations, and Generations ago




Julie Harward said...

It is such an amazing circle isn't it...and maybe the most important lesson we learn is love. Great post, your parents are so cute together on their 50th! :)

Ann Marie said...


If I could give you a standing ovation.. I would. ♥

Saimi said...

Great post Wendy! Your parents are so dang cute and you have such a beautiful family - it's evident your family is full of love!

The Gathering Place said...

The relationships are the only thing that really matters in the end. Everything else is just "stuff". Your family is beautiful (kids and parents)!

" Hit It......." said...

Absolutely a brilliant post. I have been struggling since I lost my dad two months ago. Many things that you said, I have felt. It's amazing how you come into this world with nothing and you leave with nothing (i.e. materialistic stuff). Thank heavens for the pictures and memories.

I know it's hard to see your folks like this. One day I promise, you would give anything for one more talk with them. Lap every moment up.

I miss you. Hugs!

camp and cottage living said...

This was a fabulous post Wendy!
These are things I've been considering myself lately, so it was timely for me.
It is often hard as we watch our children chose their own ways and stumble, just like we did. But I remind myself of all the good we tried to instill in that during the short time we had them with us, an believe by faith that they will return to their roots even if they sometimes wander off the path.
BTW, you have a beautiful family!

dbs said...

Legacy. I agree; it's never tangible. Thank you for these words. They made me feel like someone threw a blanket on me while I was sleeping.

Becky said...

Thank you for sharing and reminding of what matters ... really matters.

jeanne, backyard neighbor said...

Hi Wendy, I am glad I stopped in because I never know when you write a new post. Not that it matters because I always enjoy reading your posts more than once. There is always so many thoughts to ponder. Like today. Through the generations your thoughts are right on. Your parents look wonderful in their 50th photo. My parents almost made it to their 50th. Then my mom passed away at 65. So sad and I miss her still. I barely remember my great grandparents and my grandparents were so far away. I adore the pic with you and your grandparents. You look adorable in that photo and your grandparents looked so young. I also loved the photo of your five children. A handsome and beautiful bunch. I can tell you they will have wonderful memories with a mom like you. Your love and values will always be with them. That is what life is all about. Not one of us can live our lives without hills and valleys. However, the love of parents and grandparents is what sustains us all through life. Thank you for sharing your beautiful family and your thoughts about the legacy we can all leave our loved ones. Love is everything and 'things' do not matter.

Love you bunches my sweet friend.

joanne said...

that was amazing! I don't remember ever reading such a beautiful and powerful post. I love the pictures and the quotes, they really touched my heart. You are so right...the circle continues and will be unbroken through eternity. Be well my friend.

Pondside said...

You've sure got it right about what matters. It's all about love and family - and growing that family in love.

Tina said...


Deserae said...

I am not great with words so all I can really come up with to express myself is.....great post. It really touched me :o)

Michelle Lunt said...

What a beautiful post Wendy. And I loved the photos of your mom & dad. You are in a difficult stage right now & I remember it well. I think your thoughts were "right on" about how we leave a mark on the world & the lives of our loved ones. As for me, it is the good memories I cherish most. Stuff wears out & doesn't last, but beautiful experiences together endure. May the Lord buoy you up & bless you.

Warmly, Michelle
PS - GEEZ your kids are SO gorgeous!!!

Roslyn said...

You have a beautiful family Wendy and that is the legacy your parents also leave, your legacy doubles up on theirs.

Shelia said...

OH, Wendy, your post has brought tears to my eyes. It is so hard when our folks get older. You're so right about what is left and memories! What lovely pictures of your family and your children are so beautiful! Thank you sweetie for your love and support.
Shelia ;)

Mimi Sue said...

Excellent post today Wendy! The older I get the more I know how true what you wrote is. Enjoy the little things. Sooo important. Mimi

Georgia said...

I've been doing quite a bit of analyzing life myself know, wondering what it's all about. And I, like your parents, have great faith and know all the Sunday School answers, but pain can make us question the meaning of it all. The unknown amount of suffering still to be done is worrisome (to say the least). If we had just a second's worth of a glimpse into what is expected of us and then where we go after this life, it probably wouldn't be so difficult to go through the hurting portion of the plan.

Thanks for sharing all these inner wonderings of your heart, Wendy. It is so interesting how our parents take on a new role as they age. I always thought my dad was a Hercules; nothing could bring him down. But watching him struggle and die, I realized he was human after all. I haven't gotten over it yet and it's been seven years.

DesertHen said...

Wendy, this is a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful post! **sniff**

We are going through stuff with my mother-in-law and there has been a lot of reflecting on my part lately!

Oh and the word discombobulated is one that I use often and a word that I love! =)

Pedaling said...

really nice post, wendy.
as i visit with my own mom and others who are seeing the effects of aging, i see their difficulties.
it's really hard. more than i realized.
i love your song lyrics mixed i and really liked the Columbus quote you included.
i see the love...just by looking at the pic of you with your arm around your mom's waist. that's all she needs right now...your love and understanding.

sure liked the pics of your parents and their memories..grateful to be a small part of your life and peek into your window...aka blog.

Castles Crowns and Cottages said...

WOMAN, that was prose-poetry. YES IT WAS. Don't ever say you can't write a poem, 'cause ya just did. Poetry these days doesn't sound or look like that of the 19th-early 20th centuries. It is about US, the people, in our languages. It is about the ORDINARY lived out and written out in the EXTRAORDINARY. Your parents/grands lived out the poem, you are writing all about it.

THANK YOU for this view into "Where You're From."

Much love, Anita

tammy said...

I love knowing that the relationships with our families that we create on this earth, will continue and be carried on in the next life. I feel sorry for those that spend their lives obtaining riches instead of what really matters.

mCat said...

What a beautiful post Wendy. I love your thoughts and they get me thinking on my own.

The pic of the kids is great! And I wish I had a picture of me with my grandparents. What a treasure

Doran & Jody said...

Great post!
Ditto, ditto, ditto!!

June said...

Another awesome thoughtful post from my therapist! SO many things to be thankful and you are one of them!
much love...

C'est moi Claudette said...

boob-a-loobing?? You do throw in the laughing gland through your sorrow. I feel it. I know it's weighing heavy on your heart. I know I've been there like many others. I'm sorry but I'm shocked at how your sweet mama looks : (
You my dear BGF should never try to out think the values and morals you have instilled in your children and now your grandchildren. We ALL make mistakes and bad choices. ALL-OF-US. It matters how big our hearts are and how we treat the ones we love.
I wish you and your parents a peaceful ending in this world. It's what they want. And i know if you could give them that, you would. That is your wish right now.... I KNOW.
I'm crying just thinking about what you have to face in the next while my sweet BGF. I'm glad Barry is there to hold your hand through it. And I know your kids will be there to hold your hand. Matt is waiting for them with open arms.
Sending you love on this miserable grey day. Try and stay positive for them Wendy. I know you can do it. I'm sending you big huge hugs. Can you feel em? I hope so.
LOVE YOU MY BGF sooooo much.

Anonymous said...

wow wee - you hit it on the nail totally perfectly..The circle of life continues on and on -- I just did NOT think it would arrive at my door step so soon.. the getting old and feeling it.. tears filled my eye when I saw the photo of your parents and you - it hit me hard -- what a sweet photo - I love it.. Thinking of you dear friend..

Connie said...

Your posts always make me think and smile. It's a good thing none of us are perfect or we wouldn't be able to enjoy life with our family. Hang in there with your sweet parents. Too bad it can't all be easy! (Sigh) hugs to you!

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Merrilli McKee said...

Hello, Wendy -

Thanks for the beauty and heart in your blog. I found you quite by accident - I googled an inquiry to find pictures of girls in storms, and the beautiful painting of the young woman in the green field with storm clouds above her was one of the images. When I clicked on it, it took me to your blog.

Do you happen to know the origins of this picture? I would love to purchase a large print of it somehow.

I live in Duchesne, Utah. You are probably super busy, but if you have a chance to reply, I would greatly appreciate it!

Cheers - Merrilli McKee :)